No matter how many children you currently have, you've likely run into the possibility of having more, be it a desire of your own or the subject of questions from people around you. If the idea of having another child has been bouncing around in your mind, be very careful about what you decide. Too many people let their emotions get to them when they try to make a decision; instead, you need to look at practical issues including how the decision would affect your existing children -- and how your existing children might affect the new addition.
Does Not Play Well With Others
Take a look at how your children behave now, especially around younger children. No one wants to admit that their child might not be a good influence, but some children can be tough to deal with. If you have received complaints about your child bullying other children, for example, that would be a point against having more children until you could figure out how to handle your current child's problems.
On the other hand, your child could already be showing signs of being a great and sensible big brother or sister. That's no guarantee that the new child would be easy to handle or that the two children would even get along, but it is a positive sign that an addition to the family might not be as disruptive as you thought. And, if sibling rivalry did show up, it could be a more mellow type that is relatively easy to handle. Some children are absolutely thrilled to have a little brother or sister even if it means more competition for attention.
Money, of Course
You've got to look at your future, and the future of your children. Even if you are employed and doing well now, how would adding the costs of raising another child affect your ability to save for retirement, handle emergencies, and save for your existing child's college years? What if you or your spouse received a great job offer that meant moving and possibly being a one-income family for a while? Would having additional children then be a strain?
Who Is Doing the Asking?
Sometimes both parents wonder about having more children, but many times it's one parent who starts advocating for extending the family. If there's an imbalance between what the parents want, hold off having additional children. The added stress that goes along with raising even the best of children can create cracks in a marriage or partnership.
If you'd like to discuss what having more children would do to various aspects of your life, contact family planning centers like Abortion Care. Staff there can either sit down with you or refer you to counselors who can help you hash out just why you are thinking of having another child and how sensible it might be to wait or go ahead.
Share16 November 2015
